ALICE IN WONDERLAND
PLAYSCRIPT - MAY 2010
ACT 8
Alice appears on the stage with the two pieces of mushroom in her two hands.
ALICE: Goodness... I wonder if I’ll ever get to see the white rabbit again. Hmmm... I better save these. (And she puts the two pieces of mushroom inside her pockets) Now let’s see, where was I? Hmmm, I wonder which way I ought to go...
CHESHIRE CAT: Uh... loose something?
ALICE: Oh! Hehe, Oh uhhh... hehe... I- I was... no, no, I- I- I- I mean, I uhh... I was just wondering...
CHESHIRE CAT: Oh uhh, that’s quite all right! Oh, hrmm, one moment please... Oh!
ALICE: Why, why you’re a cat!
CHESHIRE CAT: A Cheshire Cat.
ALICE: Oh, wait! Don’t go, please!
CHESHIRE CAT: Very well.
ALICE: Oh no no no... thank you, but- but I just wanted to ask you which way I ought to go.
CHESHIRE CAT: Well, that depends on where you want to get to.
ALICE: Oh, it really doesn’t matter, as long as I c...
CHESHIRE CAT: Then it really doesn’t matter which way you go! Ah-hmm.... Oh, by the way, if you’d really like to know, he went that way.
ALICE: Who did?
CHESHIRE CAT: The white rabbit.
ALICE: He did?
CHESHIRE CAT: He did what?
ALICE: Went that way!
CHESHIRE CAT: Who did?
ALICE: The white rabbit!
CHESHIRE CAT: What rabbit?
ALICE: But didn’t you just say... I mean... oh dear!
CHESHIRE CAT: However, if I were looking for a white rabbit, I’d ask the Mad Hatter.
ALICE: The Mad Hatter? Uh... no, no, I do- I do...
CHESHIRE CAT: Or, there’s the March Hare. In that direction.
ALICE: Oh, thank you. I- I think I shall visit him.
CHESHIRE CAT: Of course, he’s mad too.
ALICE: But I don’t want to go among mad people!
CHESHIRE CAT: Oh, you can’t help that. Almost everyone is mad here. Ha... ha ha ha ha ha! You may have noticed that I’m not all there myself.... hahaha... (and he leaves the stage laughing and leaving Alice alone).
ALICE: Goodness. If the people here are like that, I- I must try not to upset them. How very curious!
END OF ACT 8
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